Okay, so today I decided to tackle this “osu! come after me, I’m a man” thing. I’ve seen some crazy videos online, and I figured, “Why not give it a shot?” I mean, how hard could it be, right? Famous last words, I guess.
Getting Started
First things first, I downloaded osu!. I’d heard of it before, seen some gameplay, but never actually tried it myself. The install was pretty quick, no problems there. Then I created an account – pretty standard stuff. I picked a username I thought was cool, and then I was in.
Finding the Beatmap
Next up, I needed to find the actual “come after me” beatmap. I did some searching on the osu! website and, thankfully, found it pretty quickly. There are like a million different versions, so I just grabbed one that looked popular and had a high star rating. I figured, go big or go home, am I right?
The First Attempt…Ouch
I loaded up the beatmap, and… wow. It started off okay, I think. I managed to hit a few notes, feeling pretty good. Then the speed picked up. And picked up. And picked up some more. My fingers were flying across the keyboard, but it felt like I was just randomly mashing buttons. My accuracy went straight down the toilet. I failed. Miserably. Like, not even 30 seconds in, I think.
Practice Makes…Slightly Less Terrible?
I wasn’t going to give up that easily, though. I tried again. And again. And again. Each time, I got a little bit further. I started to recognize some of the patterns, but my fingers just couldn’t keep up. I spent a good hour just repeatedly failing, my hand starting to cramp up. I took a few breaks, stretched my fingers, and jumped back in.
Incremental Progress (and a Lot of Swearing)
Slowly, very slowly, I started to see some improvement. I still wasn’t anywhere close to completing the beatmap, but I was lasting longer. I figured out that I needed to use both hands on the keyboard, alternating between ‘Z’ and ‘X’ for the clicks. It helped a bit, but my coordination was still all over the place. There was a lot of frustrated sighing (and maybe a few choice words) involved.
Finally…A Tiny Victory!
After what felt like an eternity, I finally made it past the one-minute mark! It was a small victory, but it felt huge. I still failed shortly after, but I was getting better. I could feel my fingers getting more used to the rapid movements, and my brain was starting to process the patterns a little faster.
The End (For Now)
I eventually had to stop because my hand was seriously about to fall off. I definitely didn’t “beat” the beatmap, not even close. But I made some progress, and that’s what matters. I learned that this “osu! come after me” thing is seriously no joke. It takes a lot of practice, coordination, and probably a bit of masochism. I’ll definitely be back to try it again, though. Maybe tomorrow, when my hand recovers.
